How to educate a successful child is a matter of concern for every parent. But as the first teacher of a child, parents' words and deeds are deeply influencing their children. If you don't want to educate failed children, the following types of parents must avoid.
First, I'm all for you.
This kind of parents often use this kind of words to hypnotize their children, and such children dare not vent their anger even though they are wronged and angry. Why? Because my parents are all for my good, I am not qualified to refute. Such a person will always live in the eyes and evaluations of others when he grows up, and dare not have his own ideas. He is really very tired and should not have his own ideas. He will feel that I always owe others, so such a person is repressed and dare not break through.
The second is the language violence type of parents.
Why are you so stupid? Why did I give birth to such useless things as you? Many parents will use this rude language to hurt their children. Children who grow up in the violence of language, in fact, are fundamentally negative to themselves, because when they were young, their parents always pick their noses and eyes. Even if you do well, they will find that you do poorly. So he has no confidence and courage in his heart.
Third, growth path manipulation parents.
Help children decide a lot of life events, such as what school to go to, what major to study, what job to look for, and even who to have a partner with. The parents have made arrangements for such a child. When he grows up, he is likely to do something he does not like, and then marry what he does not like, and become what he does not like. But such a person is likely to be more rebellious. In fact, he wants to break away from his parents' control in his subconscious.
Fourth, parents who are deeply infected with bad habits.
For example, alcoholism, gambling, violence, etc., such children themselves will hate this bad habit, but the problem is that they are likely to suffer from this bad habit themselves. Another possibility is that this bad habit may also appear in the partner he is looking for. Why? Because you are more familiar with this feeling subconsciously, he will be very painful, but he feels that life is a vicious circle. He will have a skeptical and fearful attitude towards intimate relations, because he was hurt by his closest people since he was young, so it is difficult for such people to experience the feeling of complete trust and openness between friends and relatives.
Fifth, physically abusive parents.
Children who grow up under the physical abuse of their parents are either tyrants or slaves. Why a tyrant? Because his parents treat him like this, if they have problems, they can use their fists to solve them. Why can they still be slaves? This was raised by his parents. In marriage, he dared not break away even if he was subjected to domestic violence.
Sixth, parents who constantly quarrel
The couple quarreled every day. The child who grew up in this environment has no feelings for marriage, and even he is repelled by marriage. He does not believe that there will be happiness and sweetness in marriage, and he does not believe that marriage can be sustained. Therefore, such a person will always change partners, or he has an impulse to cheat, because this can verify the belief that marriage is unreliable, and the bad experience of your native family is the source of your character defects. But we should know that it is not our fault, it is our parents' fault.
More importantly, you should not repeat the mistakes of our own children's original family. You need to break away from the cycle and become a better person.
