Do you know? Social phobia is a wonderful phenomenon unique to human beings. How can social phobia be cured? The following is how to cure the social phobia brought to you by Xiaobian for your reference. Let's have a look!
1. In fact, the best way to face social fear is not to force yourself to overcome it, but to accept it. The emotional control behind social fear
Some people may say that social fear is simply counselling. Do adults have the courage to do so? But the author Harris believes that there is really nothing human can do about fear. At first it seems illogical. After all, from childhood to adulthood, we have been taught that people can control their emotions, even the negative emotions of tension and pain. For example, when I was a child, I didn't dare to sleep by myself. When I turned off the light, my mind was full of ghost stories. But when I complained to my parents, they would always say, "You are so grown up, and you are still shy of the dark."; When I broke up with my lover when I grew up, my friend comforted me: "You have to change your mind. You have to leave this tree, and there will be a large forest in the future. You should be happy. What can you be sad about?" According to this logic, it is natural to control emotions. As long as we are rational and restrained, we can stay away from pain and achieve happiness.
Having been indoctrinated with this view, when we grow up and encounter sad things, we often say to ourselves: "Why cry? It's no big deal." "I'm too cowardly. I need to cheer up quickly"; "It must be too busy. I wish I was too busy to dream.". However, Harris believes that this way of thinking about controlling emotions is precisely the problem itself.
Therefore, in order to ensure that we are sociable, the brain will constantly compare with other people around us to ensure that we are popular and not excluded. In Harris' view, behind the demand for emotional control, there is also a set of untenable logic - society acquiesces that happiness should be, and misfortune is a defect. But is happiness really normal? In the author's opinion, on the contrary, happiness is not natural, but misfortune is more common. WHO predicts that by 2020, depression may become the second largest disease in human beings after cardiovascular and cerebrovascular diseases; Among adults, about 1/10 people have suicidal thoughts, and 1/5 will suffer from depression. In addition to the classified mental disorders, there are many psychological problems in life, such as loneliness, divorce, midlife crisis, loss of life goals, etc.
2. Accept rather than avoid
Social fear itself is not terrible. In the program, Jiang Sida, who is not sociable, bluntly pierced the essence of social fear: what social fear hates is actually a sense of loss, which stems from being different from what he expected. The imagination is very funny, the reality is very awkward, and there is an interesting point of view: fear itself is not terrible, it is people's judgment, which gives it terrible rights. The same goes for social phobia. Like Chi Zi, the guest in the second episode, he has the invincible confidence to regard the camera as shit, which makes Sida curious. Under constant questioning, the pool, which seems to have grown from a happy childhood to a big one, rarely shared its own story:
When he was 17 years old and went to high school, his mother got brain cancer. Although she had surgery in time, her mother's condition did not improve fundamentally. By the time he was in senior three, her symptoms appeared again. At first, I couldn't walk steadily, and then I couldn't stand up, and then I couldn't lift my right hand, which was a very slow process. Later, there was no rule of law, and I had to wait for death. When it comes to this dark moment, the tone of Chi Zi is not too turbulent. The post-95 child can see clearly. He said that optimism is not laughing at funny things, but laughing at bad things.
It can be seen that emotion itself is not good or bad. It is just an idea and a judgment that social fear is bad.
3. Relax properly
This can ease the psychological fear. Stand steadily on both feet, gently stand on tiptoe, hold it for a few seconds, and then put it down. At the same time, do rhythmic deep breathing while counting. Do this in two to three groups, 30 times in each group, and you can generally alleviate psychological fear.
4. Accept and trust yourself
Social phobia can't accept one's own performance to some extent. From now on, stop criticizing and criticizing yourself, and don't run away with fear. You know, if you don't trust yourself, who else in the world will trust you?
5. Practice social situations yourself
They often rehearse in their own minds, or treat benches, tables, etc. as strangers for social practice. More times, more time, the effect is obvious.
6. Choose friendly people to communicate with
Friendly people know how to respect a person, and we can easily get recognition from them, thus building our social confidence.
