After a breakup, for people who want to save their love, how to get back their former lover is a headache. Texting her non-stop and calling will only make her move further and further away from you, because doing so does not address the root cause of the emotional breakdown, and it only fuels more conflict when you stress your relationship.
After a breakup, you want the other party to change your mind, want to redeem the other party, and want the other party to come back to you, I think many people know a word, that is, "secondary attraction"!
Emotional cryonics. In the early stages of a breakup, both parties need to be emotionally calm and mentally relaxed. So what you need to do at this stage is to give the other person enough time and space and not to harass her. The wrong way to redeem you is not to get the other party to look back at you, but to hate and disgust you even more. Therefore, it is a good time to freeze your emotions appropriately, no matter how reluctant you are, you need to control your behavior.
During this period of cold treatment, don't let the other person feel that you have too much need for her, or even make her feel that you have no need for her. In this way, maybe you have already stimulated the other person, or maybe she has counter-demanded you. Cold treatment does not mean that you completely ignore the other party, but emotionally, emotionally coldly, so that the other party may not have too much pressure, and it is more important that you are fully prepared to contact the other party after you are promoted.
Boost your appeal. Presumably part of the reason she broke up with you was because you weren't attractive enough, or because you weren't attractive at that time. People will have aesthetic fatigue and like to pursue better things and people, so you have to give her a different you.
If you want to attract your ex, you must first transform yourself from your appearance, first, increase your self-confidence, and the corresponding recovery mentality will gradually become better; Second, a new image will create a great visual impact on a woman, and her first feeling is that you have changed and become better, then she will want to understand your life again.
In the case of having a good external image, the inner improvement is especially important, because you can't let the woman understand that you are still the same after a few days, and there is no real change.
Therefore, inner improvement is fundamental, you have to learn to enrich your life, expand your social circle, you can sprint your career, and at the same time hone your character to be empathetic. In short, what you want to show should be positive things, so that women will have a feeling of "lost" when they see it, and they want to catch it back.
In the past, your value was lost in love, and the above two steps are to let you recover and enhance your value, and the woman finds that you have a value that he has never explored, and she will be curious about you again. So how do you show your worth?
Here you can show it through your social circle, because even after you break up, she will go to your circle of friends to see what you have been doing lately, so you will show your value in these places, and she can see it for the first time; In addition, it can also be displayed by creating a chance encounter or a gathering of friends, of course, the impact of offline meetings is greater, you have to grasp it.
Give your relationship a stress-off. Reflect on yourself, take the initiative to admit your mistakes, and silently correct them, and your changes will definitely be visible to the other party in the near future, which will also prepare you for the second time to attract the other party. Don't rush to prove yourself at this time, don't argue for yourself, everything you do is to decompress your relationship. Only when she gradually forgets all the bad things you used to have, will she be willing to recall your previous happy times, and when she recalls you, she will take the initiative to care about your current situation. This is also to pave the way for her to see your changes in the future.
Secondly, you need to make yourself better through your own efforts. Each of us is constantly going to a higher place, we are constantly improving, we can't stay in place because of feelings, if you stay in place, and the other party is constantly climbing up, the gap between you will be bigger and bigger, and the words will become more and more unable to speak together, and contradictions will arise.
There is no such thing as a relationship, so all we can say is that two weeks to a month after your breakup or rejection is the best time to improve.
The second attraction is not a deliberate temporary change for the other person, but a real change that requires you, and your attraction will inadvertently radiate.
In fact, redemption and giving up are between a thought, if you are still struggling with whether to redeem, and constantly find obstacles for yourself, then it is recommended that you give up, if you want to redeem, then please firm your thoughts, do not hesitate to work hard, do not let yourself leave regrets, miss may be a lifetime.
Sometimes girls don't understand why a man ignores himself for a day of sullenness, in fact, it may be that he lost a game; What the man doesn't understand is why the relationship is very good, but the confession was rejected by her, in fact, it is most likely because your relatively fast pursuit progress scared her.
Therefore, it is really difficult to fully understand a girl, and the best way is to attract her. I'm here to share with you a few ways to attract girls.
1. Intrinsic attraction
This stems from the attraction between men and women, which strips away all material conditions, as long as a normal man can produce attraction to women, which is the result of human nature.
Think about the primitive society thousands or even tens of thousands of years ago, when there were no current conditions, but it was still able to maintain the immutable iron law of male and female intercourse and reproduction.
But this kind of attraction, in the 21st century, which is now rich in materials, is not so easy to use, if you still only have this level of attraction, then you may have to face the embarrassing situation of not being able to find a wife.
2. Sexual attraction
Sexy women are the most fatal attraction to men; And sexy men also have a strong attraction to women.
A woman's attraction to a man is basically the same, with large breasts, thin waist, plump hips, and long legs; Men are different in their attraction to women, muscles, voice, dress, and even a look can bring a sexy experience to a woman.
This attraction is multiplied by the effect of alcohol. But this kind of attraction is extremely unstable and not long-lasting, and the requirements for men and women are not necessarily, because most men are, but it is not so easy to find a woman who can go to bed casually.
3. Value attraction
The words "rich" basically include all the essence of value attraction, just a "rich" word, covering almost eighty percent of the meaning, car, house, clothing, status. This basically explains why there is never a shortage of women around the rich and handsome, and there is never a shortage of women around the big bosses.
But this kind of attraction has relatively high requirements for itself, and generally speaking, there is no way to change it in the short term, and this kind of attraction for women not only does not last long, but also is not reliable, because there will always be a lot of people in society who are taller, more handsome, and richer than you.
Fourth, emotional attraction
We all know that the production of love needs to be based on the secretion of dopamine, and only mood swings and emotional stimulation can prompt human beings to secrete the dopamine needed for love, so as to produce a sense of dizziness of happiness.
This is an intoxicating form of attraction, and it is also a way of love that I highly recommend, because no matter who you are, you have the ability to make people feel emotional.
Fifth, investment attraction
The investment here does not mean co-investing in a project, let's imagine such a picture first.
In various literary movies, we can often see that a little ruffian who is sloppy and unkempt and full of wine punches and kicks a beautiful and kind woman, without any pity, but this woman is still reluctant to leave, this little ruffian who hurt her.
Do you know why?
The reason is that because this woman has paid too much for the man who beat her, if she withdraws at this time, she will feel that her previous efforts have been in vain, so it will be difficult to let go, and she would rather endure and let go, and slowly she will get used to this kind of day.
There are several ways to attract women, and most men are still confused on the road of nature attraction and value attraction, and the result is often half the effort, thankless, even if the relationship is established, there is no happiness in love.
Here I want to talk about value attraction again, due to the influence of the rich and handsome, more than 80% of men have focused their goals on how to make themselves taller, richer and more handsome.
Of course, it's no wonder that everyone thinks so, because all of us have seen that there is never a shortage of women around the rich and handsome. Therefore, some people are busy with plastic surgery, some people are busy with gym, and some people are desperately working overtime to make money, etc.
And this practice often leads to their own inability to achieve their goals, and they are unable to pick up women, and it is their norm to be overstretched while taking care of one another.
Because we all know that it is very, very difficult to improve our hard value, not to mention that the white horse is only between breaths, and often before the struggle has made a name, more than half of the youth has passed.
Even if you have finally become the person you want to be after years of hard work, the woman you like has already been married.
There is an even worse and more hurtful situation: you finally become the person the girl wants, but the girl has changed her original mind, which is the sad reason why many people are issued a good person card, even if they reluctantly agree to be together, the relationship is full of contradictions.
This is because most of the boys have chosen the wrong focus, in fact, we should focus on the two aspects of emotional attraction and investment attraction.
Next, I will tell you another important point, we all know: what is too easy to get is often not cherished by people. If you blindly please girls, or obey girls, it will also cause this kind of reaction of girls who don't know how to cherish.
It was once possible that you yourself voluntarily gave up on a woman who loved you dearly, leaving her heartbroken. If you find that the person you love the most in your heart is her, and no other woman can replace her, then you might as well show your attitude, take the initiative to get in touch with the other party, and then stand in front of her and say "I love you" loudly, no matter what the result is, let the other party know your heart.
Be prepared for rejection:
You should also be prepared to be rejected by her when you have a superficial attitude, after all, you hurt her before, and it is a bit unrealistic to ask her to forgive you all at once. When the other party rejects you, it may not be that the other party has figured out whether to accept you again, or it may be that the other party is testing you to see if you are sincere. After all, you have already been hurt once, and if the woman refuses to start over or simply ignores you, you can't give up right away.
Take the initiative to care for each other:
If a woman no longer loves you, she can also choose to be friends again after the breakup. At this time, we should seize every opportunity to take the initiative to care for her, lend a helping hand in time when she is in difficulty, and accompany her to see a doctor in time when she is sick and helpless. Be more considerate of her, care more about her, and believe that sincerity is the golden stone, and your efforts will be rewarded by her sooner or later.
Changing the strategy of chasing women:
When pursuing a woman for the second time, it must not be the same as the first time, because people will grow, and the strategy of the past may not be useful now. The woman used to love you so much, maybe she didn't think about it so much at the time, and as she got older, she gradually knew what she wanted. If you want to make a woman look at yourself again, you must understand what stage the other party is currently growing up to, which aspect of the man you like, and then show your strengths or abilities in this regard.
Strive to improve yourself:
It may have been that the woman you loved left you because you were useless, and at this time you have to work hard to promote your position, study hard and increase your ability. Generally women like their men to be an attractive and useful person, when you improve yourself and achieve certain achievements in your work, maybe at this time women will show their adoration to you, and will be attracted to you again or even fall in love with you again.
