Emotional value means: refers to the ability to make oneself and the other person's emotions resonate by expressing emotions, so as to make the relationship between two people closer and more emotionally profound.
This means that in order to successfully "provide emotional value", there must first be a high level of "emotional" involvement. All other things being equal, the most effective way to express the same emotions is to get along face-to-face.
Because of the tone of voice, the expressions, and the body movements, your emotions will be of the greatest value. If you want to better express your emotions and cause emotional resonance in others, it is best to find an opportunity to talk to the other person face-to-face.
And once the other person is moved and attracted by your emotions, you can also seize the opportunity in time to advance your relationship through hugging, kissing and other physical contact.
People with high emotional value can make others feel emotionally trusted and dependent, because such people can make others feel comfortable. In relationships, such as external image, assets, education, background, conversation, etc., these are all very important, but it is often not the above that breaks a relationship.
The real reason was that you made me feel uncomfortable, and there was no extra reason for me to stay, so we broke up. Therefore, in a long-term relationship, emotional value is a very important ability.
What is emotional value, why should it be provided, and how should it be provided? So this time, I will talk about what emotional value is and the role of emotional value.
Emotional value is a value ability of a person to influence the emotions of others. For example, if a friend chats with you very much, and he can make him smile from ear to ear when he says two words, and he feels very happy and comfortable with you, then the emotional value you provide to his friend is high value, if he thinks that you don't understand her, and many points of view are different, and even you always refute him, then he will feel very tired to get along with you, then the value you provide is negative value, and it is a low value for him.
The role of high emotional value is to enhance feelings and maintain feelings. This value is also often used in chat situations, where humor, praise, encouragement, and comfort can all bring positive emotions to people. The more you offer, the closer your relationship will become. For example, if a girl is criticized by the leader, at this time her emotions are negative and need to be vented, if you ignore her emotions, reason with her first, and deny her words, then the emotions you provide are negative, and your relationship will become more and more negative. The way to provide positive emotions is that you don't discuss right and wrong with her first, but first soothe his emotions and take her out to eat delicious food, or stand in the same position as her, complain about his guidance with her, and help her vent her emotions, and then you discuss the issue with her according to right and wrong, and encourage her to look at it in the right mind and direction.
So how do we provide emotional value in our daily chats? That is to establish a sense of connection, find similarities from your interests, past experiences, and personalities, establish a common language, and after talking, you can gradually go in this ambiguous direction, and then the front chat is good, and it becomes very easy to chat within the ambiguous. Of course, in fact, as long as you find that point, you can enjoy the pleasure of this emotion for each other.
To put it simply, emotional value is spiritual satisfaction, which cannot be seen or touched, but can make people have positive mood swings, which can produce a strong sense of pleasure.
This kind of pleasure is different from the pleasure of eating, drinking, and having fun, it is a deeper psychological satisfaction.
You are happy to help others and don't make a penny, but the sense of accomplishment praised by others makes you happy for a day, which is an emotional value;
When you encounter setbacks and find someone to complain, the other party does not help you at all, but her encouragement can rekindle your hope, which is an emotional value;
You know that the scumbag/scumbag is not good for you, and even hurts you, but the other party can make you want to stop and knowingly commit a crime through a few words and certain attitudes, which is also an emotional value.
In many cases, emotional values are even more effective than material values, and can even break through the barriers of reality.
1. Why are girls always obsessed with "emotional value"?
Compared with boys, girls have higher social standards, and are generally more sensitive and inferior, and are more likely to be confused and lose themselves in relationships.
On this basis, most girls lack a firm sense of self and self-confidence, even if they are good enough, they are still prone to gains and losses in relationships.
This leads to the fact that the more serious a girl is about a person, the more she needs recognition and praise, encouragement and comfort from the other person. That is, the need for "emotional value" is much higher than that of men, especially young girls who have little love experience.
But many girls are ashamed to speak, and even don't understand their real needs, only know that they "want to be coaxed", if the other party can't do it, it is "stupid straight man, no emotion", but because they can't communicate, they can only show the unhappiness in their hearts, which is unreasonable in behavior, and conveys to boys that they are unreasonable, lovely, and emotional.
Girls think they're right, and boys think they're okay. And the biggest misunderstanding between the two is that many times the "emotional value" is not provided in place.
2. What are the specific aspects of the "emotional value" that girls want? Should there be responsiveness?
When a girl tells you that she needs emotional value, there must be a few areas where you are not doing a good job:
1. Provide positive feedback in a timely manner
In life, the most frequent emotional value is in feedback.
As long as there is contact and small talk between the two sides, there is no such thing as complete initiative and complete passivity. Many times, it seems that the other party takes the initiative to share small things, but in fact, it is the emotional value of her asking for positive feedback.
She sends you a selfie before she goes out, and you can indeed pass by, but she prefers that you can make a serious evaluation, of course, it is better to compliment.
She shares something boring with you that may not matter to you, but she wants you to be angry with her rather than turn a blind eye.
Take the initiative to express the importance of girls to themselves and be brave enough to express their love
Especially in the middle and late stages of love, boys will feel that their feelings have entered a dull period, and the mood and romance have also been reduced by half, and there is nothing to be hypocritical about old husbands and wives.
But in the world of many girls, she still needs the enthusiasm and bright love when she is in love, when you really give the girl a sense of security, the girl will reduce the gains and losses in the process of getting along, but will be more empathetic.
"A person's best look is loved", this is especially significant in girls.
Therefore, boldly express your love, the girl will not think you are hypocritical, let alone unhappy, she may be disgusted on the surface, but she must be secretly happy behind it, and the emotional value will be full instantly.
3. Understand and tolerate, appease the emotions at the first time, and after the emotions are solved, most of the problems will be solved
Emotional value, as the name suggests, is to manipulate emotions.
When a girl has mood swings, what she needs most is that you can help her recover her mood, not solve the problem on top of her emotions.
Therefore, once there is a conflict between the two, or the girl is in a bad mood and encounters setbacks, the first choice you have to make is not to blame and preach, but to give her a warm embrace, understanding and comfort, which can solve 90% of her current pain.
After the pain is resolved, maybe she thinks of a solution that is more rational and effective than you.
4. Physical contact is the simplest and most effective emotional value
If you're stupid, use body language to express your feelings.
You can't hide liking someone, your eyes, body, smell and even temperature can provoke the same mood swings in the other person. For couples who love each other, many times, a long speech is not worth a wordless hug.
5. Express your sense of well-being
Many times, you don't need to deliberately focus on the other person, you just need to describe your feelings, and you can also make the girl feel strong emotional satisfaction.
This is because a girl wants her existence to be beneficial and special for you, just like she cooks a meal for you, maybe tired, but watching you eat happily, she will be happier than you.
Learning to express one's well-being in a relationship is also an important way to provide emotional value effectively and easily.
Having said all this, is the intention to make you responsive to the "emotional value" that girls need? Waiting for you?
Also not recommended.
It is true that girls are more emotionally sensitive, and it is not false that they need emotional value as a stabilizer of feelings, but it is not recommended to be responsive.
Because, emotional value is addictive.
Its appearance will satisfy your long-term psychological emptiness, such as being ignored and denied for a long time. Once satisfied, you can feel mentally complete for a while, and it doesn't cost you.
In ordinary relationships, being good at providing emotional value can indeed enhance the relationship between the two parties;
However, for intimate relationships, providing emotional value too frequently may lead to the formation of emotional dependence on the other party, so it is still necessary to be just right, appropriately requested, and appropriately provided.
