When a good friend comes to you to complain about something hard, how can he enlighten you? Especially when a girl comes to you to complain, you should never try to persuade her to be so coquettish. The following three ways to persuade people should not be used.
Wrong guidance mode:
1. Teacher like
People come to you to vent their emotions, but you haven't listened to them yet. Before they can vent their emotions, you come up to reason with the other party, and you come up to preach to the other party. Then can the other party listen to you? So don't be a teacher. Don't come up and give advice to the other party.
2. Cannon type
It is also inadvisable to say bad words to attack the other party afterwards. For example, "I told you that the man was not good, but you didn't listen to the advice. What's going on now?" Everything has already happened. If you say such a hasty remark now, it is not equivalent to that someone has been stabbed. Do you come here again to make up for it. So don't talk about this kind of afterthought.
3. Speak ill of that man
"That person is a scum. I expected that she would be no good. She has a personality problem." You speak ill of her boyfriend in front of others and persuade her to leave the person quickly. Maybe after her mood becomes stable, her boyfriend will apologize to her, and they will make up again soon. After making up, you will become a public enemy. Sooner or later, when two people are sweet, your girlfriend is likely to betray you to her boyfriend.
So never have the above three ways of enlightenment, then what is the correct way of enlightenment? Remember the following three points:
1. No judgment
Since the other party came to you to cry, in fact, she wanted to vent her emotions. If she wanted to cry, she would cry. If she wanted to say something, she would say more.
2. Empathize with her and show understanding
You should let her know that you think her current emotions and all her behaviors are reasonable. If it were me, I would do the same, even more excited. Only in this way can she feel that she has found the right person, and she will put down herself and show you the real performance. When she is more honest and true, it is easier to put those negative energies behind her and recover to her normal.
3. Give the other party enough time to digest their emotions
Many people need a recovery period when they are in a mood, so she comes to you to cry. You can leave her at your home for one night, or even take her out to play, do some fun things, slowly shift her mood, shift her attention and focus, and she will be more likely to forget those hurts. So we should give each other a recovery period, and don't be too hasty.
The above is the way that friends find you to complain and persuade. Wrong ways of persuasion should be avoided, because bad persuasion not only makes the other party feel bad, but also brings negative effects on yourself.
